Da Jesus Book!

Da Jesus Book is the New Testament translated into Hawaiian Pidgin, and it's awesome. Here is an excerpt from Matthew 19:16-30:

Wen Jesus was starting fo go, one guy wen run up by him, an go down on his knees in front him, an say, "Eh, Teacha, you good. Can aks you one question? Wat I gotta do fo live to da max foeva?"

Jesus say, "How come you call me good? Ony get One dat stay good fo real kine, dass God. You know God's Rules: No go kill nobody, no go fool aroun behind da odda's back, no rip off nobody, no bulai any kine bout nobody, no cockaroach nobody, show respeck fo yoa fadda an mudda."

Words to live by, folks. So don't go cockaroachin' nobody during this holiday season.